Sunday, April 10, 2016

The Rest of the Truth

In 2011,  I began this blog believing that I would continue to share my journey and the journey of others as a way to heal - for myself and maybe for someone else.  I wish I had an answer for why I did not continue in this forum, however, my journey continued and is written in many forms and God has continued to reveal His magnificent grace in ways that I could not imagine.  I am writing this post because as my husband becomes more of a person in the public eye, there will no doubt be questions about my journey and in particular, my post written in 2011, called "The Truth".  However, even as I write this now, I realize that I have not written because I thought that I was over my story, and ok to move forward.  The reality, however, is that even though I described this as "my story",  in fact, it is God's story and I just got to be a part of it.  So, here is the rest of the "The Truth":

It is 2011 and I have accepted this new label of "FELON" and knew that I had survived.  The weight had not crushed me, the shame had not smothered me and the label didn't define me.  When I received my sentence of a year's probation, my prayer was that my federal probation officer would be a believer, and he was.  In fact, he was a very strong believer and there is something incredibly humbling (in a good way - if that can be said) to say you have to leave to go meet your probation officer.  This year passed quickly as I became more involved with ministry, sharing my story, and living an authentic life.  However, God was not done with this story and I kept hearing Him say that he wanted me to return to my work as a hospitalist.  Of course, I thought perhaps He was talking to someone else because I was a felon and oh, I didn't have my DEA license even though I was able to keep my medical license.  However, God had been growing my trust in Him throughout this period of time and I just said, "Lord, if it is your will, you will open every door that I see as shut".  So, I began with calling the very first DEA agent that had interviewed me 5 years earlier.  I could not believe it when he remembered me and in fact stated their office had been following my case as they could not believe that I had been forced to plea.    When I told him that I felt that I was supposed to return to hospital medicine but would have to have my DEA license, he said he would help, and he did.  In fact, I had my license within a week.  Friends, NOTHING happens in the government in a week, much less something like this.  Then I went to my previous boss and partners whom willingly and lovingly advocated for me to get hospital privileges.  This also was miraculous in that "having a record" is not something good to have to put on a hospital credentialing application and still be accepted.  So, God opened the doors that I saw as closed and I was so excited to return to work in the hospital.  Life was good and then as life always does, life changed yet again.  I can remember the day so clearly, it was a sunny warm March day.  Scott was outside working in the yard and I was walking back from the mailbox, looking casually through the mail when I came upon a letter from the government.  The mail fell from my hands as I read this letter of disaster.  It stated that the Officer of the Inspector General had just received notification of my guilty plea (from 2008) and because of that I would no longer be able to care for Medicare or Medicaid patients, and oh, "this essentially will no longer allow you to practice medicine".  For 24 hours I cried without ceasing.  How, how, how could God have opened all those doors and yet allow this one to close so firmly.  I had been sharing my faith daily and thought that I had been obedient to what He had called me to do.  However, God gently reminded me that He was Faithful and True and to trust Him.   He did this by a patient named Mr. R.. Mr. R was dying from prostate cancer and I was able to share the Gospel and Jesus saved Him and we prayed together and celebrated together and then he told his daughter who cried on the phone.  As I walked out of the room, I leaned against the wall and began to weep and looked to God and said, "Lord, if it was only for this man to hear about you that you brought me to the hospital then that is enough and I'm ready for whatever happens even if I am sad" and from that point forward I had peace.  But what I thought was a closed door forever became the door that I saw as the greatest gift of God in this journey.  You see, at the time of my plea, I was very clear that the most important thing to me was the ability to practice medicine at the end of this journey.  This is why my attorney and the prosecuting attorney both requested to my medical board that I be allowed to keep my license as they thought this was appropriate and important.  However, with this letter, that ability would change, at least in my calling to return to the hospital.  Because no one had informed me of the OIG, nor in fact did they know this outcome, I had an opportunity to plead my case.  I wish that I could say all of our government worked with a sense of fairness and justice, maybe if it did then I would not have been prosecuted in the first place.  However, in God's providence, He chose to break me, mold me, grow me, and show me what only He can do, even through our government.   Therefore, with the support of my attorney's, the OIG, the Assistant US Federal Prosecutor, and the US Federal Prosecutor my case was brought back before the judge and she said, "In the interest of justice, I am here by Vacating Dr. Pyle's plea".  This occurred exactly six years to the day from the time the agents first entered my office.  If you are like me, I had to look up what that meant.  Essentially, it means to reverse the process as if I had never plead.  This is in the legal world, however, in the real world, my world, life will never be the same.  I say this and mean this, life will NEVER be the same, and that is GOOD.  I have seen God work so majestically in this journey, it never ceases to inspire me.  However, the whisper he gave me was this paraphrase from Genesis 50:20, "what satan intends for evil, God will use for good".  It was spoken first to me on that fateful day in 2006, then January of 2008 by my Pastor, then March of 2008 by the Assistant US Attorney, and finally 6 years plus one day, on my 50th birthday and the day after the judge vacated my sentence, the verse of the day that I get as a text was "what satan intends for evil, God will use for good".  
God is REAL.  He cares about the DETAILS.  He reveals Himself in big ways but more often in the quiet whispers so that we lean into Him to hear more clearly.  Am I listening?  Are you?

No comments:

Post a Comment